Happily Ever After

During a discussion with my young adult group on relationships, my mind started whirring with millions of little thoughts. Because writing has always been therapeutic for me, I thought I’d jot (or type) some of the down.

Like most other girls, I am completely enthralled by a good love story. Set me with up with The Notebook, a box of Kleenex, and some chocolate, and we have the makings of an exceptionally awesome Friday night. Anyone who knows me even moderately well would also know that I am HIGHLY addicted to a current TV series called Once Upon a Time. I have been intrigued with Disney princesses since an early age, and I love watching them each get their happily ever after. My favorite growing up was Ariel, and much to my delight, her story-line is now incorporated into this fairytale world. What’s my point?

Hollywood has disillusioned us to reality.

Do I believe in love? Yes. Do I believe that couples can have happy endings? Yes. Do I believe it’s all magic and roses? No.

The one aspect of Once Upon a Time that I have always loved is that the characters have to fight for their happy ending. Unlike most representations of fairytale love stories, it isn’t just handed to them on a silver platter. While there are several unrealistic qualities (like the whole show in general – don’t hate, it’s awesome), I have always appreciated the writers’ need to incorporate some sense of real life.

In our young adult discussion, the principle of infatuation was brought up. As with seemingly every Hollywood story, this is the basis of what our society deems as a good romance. The characters meet, fall head over heels, and in the case of my beloved Ariel and Eric, are married within days. This may also contribute to the lack of successful marriages we seem to be witnessing. What is meant to be a beautiful and holy union has been turned into a circus act. If it isn’t convenient or appealing within a few months (the infatuation has left), let’s just call it quits and find something else that tickles our fancy.

What are we teaching the younger generation?

Like many others, I have been ensnared by the false reality of what my fairytale would look like. I envisioned my knight in shining armor coming in the room, our eyes meeting, and instantaneously knowing that this was the man of my dreams. We spend so much of our lives looking for these fleeting feelings that we forget what a beautiful romance is founded on: God.

In Paul’s letter to the Corinthians, we are given many descriptions of what love is. To name a few, love is patient, love is kind, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not self-seeking, it does not delight in wrong, etc. Nowhere in there does Paul say love is built on fleeting feelings and emotional highs that last only a short time. Love is built on a solid foundation of mutual respect and a deep and unbelievable awareness of the need for God. It always troubles me when couples are engaged within months because I wonder if the fleeting feelings have been given a chance to make way for a solid friendship and partnership. So often we see that Hollywood’s kind of love is anything but patient, kind, not proud, not self-seeking, not boastful, and not delighting in other’s wrongs; Hollywood’s version seems to be just the opposite.

In my very limited experience, I have seen many couples experience a lot of hardship after the euphoria has gone away. The couples that have lasted seemed to have a relationship built not on emotions and impulsive feelings but on respect, partnership, and a grounding in God. Sometimes I think we get so caught up in enjoying the moment that we forget to include God in the decision. In watching our short video at group the other night, the speaker reminded us that next to accepting Christ, picking who you are going to marry is the most important decision. I don’t know about you other single people, but I want a love built on something that’s going to last.

Do I think I know it all? Absolutely not. I am nowhere close to having this “love” thing figured out. However, I am trying to learn all I can so as to not let myself be swept up in fantasy world that doesn’t exist.

Will I continue to watch sappy love stories? You better believe it. I still get lots of entertainment out of them. But, that is just what their purpose should be. Entertainment. As much as I love me some Prince Eric and Ariel, I am going to base my relationship on the stuff that will last.

Am I making an announcement? No, I’m sure not. I am not dating anyone, and I am perfectly happy with that. Singleness is certainly far from a curse, and I am enjoying every blessing that comes with this season. But, whenever God deems fit, I will be reminding myself of a forever love that surpasses any and all Hollywood imagination.

Thanks for letting me ramble!

In Him,
Em

The Heart of a Counselor

Have you ever experienced one of those seasons in your life when you know without a shadow of a doubt that you're doing exactly what you're supposed to be?

I am joyously experiencing one of those very seasons.

As I have started school again, it's amazing to me how quickly I've gotten back into the routine: study, eat, study, gym, study, sleep, study, have a small semblance of a social life, study, and repeat!

Many people have asked what exactly it is that I'm going back to school for. In a very uncomplicated and short response, I will receive many of the foundational skills presented in counseling so I can integrate it into a ministry setting. I want to be able to really help those I come into contact with, and this is a great place to start. It has already been completely enlightening and eye-opening. I have discovered so much more about myself and about the amazing God I serve.

If you want to get me on a forever tangent, just ask me why I think counseling is even important. I know in many Christian circles it has not always been well received. So, if I may, humor me (or just choose to move right on away from this page!) while I list just a few reasons:

1) Counseling is Biblical - Reading through my texts, the themes of redemption, reconciliation, and healing jump out from so many of the pages. That, my friends, is the whole point of counseling, and it's also all over the Gospel. Counseling is meant to be a place to really work through many of the hurts and difficulties people face and discover the redemption, reconciliation, and healing given to us on that cross over 2,000 years ago. Ephesians tells us to bear each other's burdens and let me tell you, people carry a lot of weight. We are meant to be in community with one another. There is something so encouraging about sitting down across from someone and knowing that they truly care about helping you find the healing God has for you. I am also reminded that this world (including the very people I wish to help) are so affected by the fall. People go through many hardships and not all of those are a direct result of someone's sin; sometimes bad things just happen because we live in a fallen world. However, as Christians, we have hope. Hope can be that glimmer of light when everything else seems completely dark.

2) Counseling is Liberating - Some of you are rolling your eyes right now, and that's okay. But, I'm telling you, counseling was one of the most liberating experiences I've ever had. As I sat across the room from a wonderful woman named Kerry at Evangel University, I saw the love of Christ in a way that was completely refreshing to me. As I discussed many issues (and oftentimes with shame), Kerry listened with love and helped me really believe that I could find freedom in Christ again. She showed me that shame was a tool of the enemy and that God wanted more for me. Does counseling have all the answers to all of life's hardest questions? No. But, we serve a God who does. I have read time and time again of the importance of being Spirit-led, and I'm telling you, healing can and does happen when Christian counselors allow God to work.

3) Counseling is a Tangible Expression of God's Love - Does God need humans to do His work? No, but He chooses to use us. It is no different in the realm of counseling. God has made us to be relational beings who long for connection. Counseling can open that door. We are taught (even in the secular realm of counseling) to be empathetic, to actively listen, and to show people that they are being heard. Does this mean we don't challenge and try to help uncover Biblical solutions? Of course not. However, there is something to feeling understood and genuinely cared about. One of my least favorite questions has to do with whether or not I've prayed about something. Granted, I need the reminder from time-to-time. But in that moment, I just want someone to listen and hear me out. I don't need advice. I don't need to be told what to do. I just need someone to believe that I am a capable human being who can let God help her discover the best for her life. It's easy to offer quick fixes but making someone feel understood requires an investment. I have friends that are also counselors, and every time I finish talking with them, I feel refreshed, encouraged, capable, and challenged to continue working towards God's best for me.

I'm not saying counseling is an end all to the world's issues. I'm also not saying that there aren't some flawed and not Godly concepts out there. But if the Church isn't willing to reach out to the needs of a lost and hurting world, who will? Tangible expressions of love such as giving and serving are vital and important. However, I think we forget that sometimes people also just need authentic love. Counseling can open that door. Does it need to be Spirit-led? Yes. Does it make me want to have a deeper relationship with God? Yes. I have discovered a new love of God and His word through this program. I know my heart is in counseling, but I'm not going to be as effective as I need to be if I'm not diligently pursuing my relationship with Christ. Counseling isn't just about feelings (even though it's an important part); it's also about action. I for one feel honored that God thinks I'm up for this. I want to be a person available to talk about the hard issues no one ever talks about. I've heard so many stories (myself included) of people being afraid to open up about what they're struggling with. We keep it in the darkness so no one has to know our garbage. Then, the enemy comes in and wrecks it. Satan can't distort things in darkness if we let the light of Christ bring healing.

I know this was quite the tangent, and if you read it all, props to you! I still have a lot to learn and nowhere near think I know it all. I just know this world needs some more ears. It's time to talk about the hard stuff and remind people that they are never alone. This world needs its counselors.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

In Him,
Em

Unexpected Blessing

As I write this post, I have the most amazing view. The sun is starting to set on the Rocky Mountains, and I find myself just staring at their greatness and beauty. The remaining sunlight is breaking through the clouds that surround the peaks, and it is completely breath-taking.

God sure is creative.

This weekend, my family made the jaunt up to Colorado Springs for the wedding of my cousin Robby and his new wife Sterling. It was a beautiful ceremony.

The Springs hold a special place in my mom and I's hearts; she spent a lot of her childhood here, and I was born here. It has been fun to explore and listen to my mom tell her stories of her life here.

One of my favorite experiences took place yesterday while exploring a place called Palmer Park. While stopped at an overlook, there was something sticking out of a hole in one of the benches. As I walked over, I realized there was a note attached to an object. Upon further investigation, I discovered a beautiful bracelet with a note that read, "I don't know you, but I made this for you. Have a great day. :)" I don't know how long that bracelet had been sitting there or who placed it there in the first place. I do know this; it completely blessed me.

I am not sure if said stranger is a believer, but if not, they have a beautiful heart, and I wish I could only tell them in person how much their unexpected gift meant to me. I wish I could sit down with them, if they didn't believe in Jesus, and tell them about another completely unexpected gift found on a cross over 2,000 years ago. I wish I could give them a big hug and thank them for their kindness.

I wish.

This small, yet unexpected blessing has restored my hope in humanity. With as much craziness as our world is experiencing, it is so refreshing to be reminded of the potential placed in each and every life. I will cherish this bracelet forever and let it serve as a reminder of the kindness a stranger decided to bestow on a girl he/she had never met. I will let it continue to propel me forward into the calling God has placed on my life - to know Him and to make Him known.

If this stranger, whoever you may be, happens upon this blog post at anytime, thank you. Thank you for taking time out of your life to make this beautiful piece of jewelry. Thank you for writing that note and deciding to make someone's day. As trivial as it may seem, this small token of kindness has changed my life. I hope that I can one day bless someone as you have blessed me.

Let us not miss an opportunity to do something above and beyond. Even if you never see the fruit of your gift, you never know what kind of an impact it will have.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

In Him,

Em

A Tribute to Jim

As I've sat and thought over the last few days of what exactly I could say, I realized that words will never be adequate. Words will never take away the loss of a husband, father, grandfather, son, brother, and friend. However, I want to honor the man who has invested so much into my life over my last 23 years.

I have known the Majors' family as long as I can remember. I remember Pam and Jim attending my little brother's birthday parties and harassing my mother about being the size of the universe while being pregnant. I remember Jayson toting Alex and I to the zoo or McDonalds or letting me "drive" his truck. I remember the night Jim got saved and how Pam's years of praying had helped bring on a changed man. I remember Jim spending countless hours in our home fixing whatever needed to be taken care of. I remember the orneriness of Jim and his boys, but I also remember how unconditionally Jim loved. I remember him as just being a good man.

I remember the last time I gave Jim a hug and how tightly he squeezed me. I remember how much he loved his grand kids. I remember.

Jim left a legacy, and I for one am quite honored I had the chance to know him as long as I did. I know the loss I feel is only a fraction of the loss the Majors' family feels right now. As the days and weeks plow on, I pray that peace will just overwhelm their hearts and souls.

I am thankful I got to learn from him. I am thankful he is in heaven and will be waiting with great anticipation for when the rest of his family arrives.

So Jim, thanks for being you. It impacted this young life more than you'll ever know.

Reminiscing

Writing has always been extremely therapeutic for me, and this blog has been a wonderful place to work through the many thoughts of this crazy woman.

The past few weeks have been filled with constant nostalgia (including listening to old Backstreet Boys...Lord, help me!) and reminiscing about my Evangel days and the many wonderful friends I have had the opportunity to get to know in the two years since graduation. It has also been filled with thoughts of the upcoming transition barreling my way in roughly 25 days.

Let me just tell ya, it can be a little overwhelming!

I have always said I have the best friends in the whole wide world, and I sincerely believe it. God has richly blessed me in that department, and I am eternally grateful.

For the most part, the friends closest to my particular phase of life live in far off locations. Sometimes, it flat wears on this girl's heart. Don't get me wrong, I have some wonderful people right here at home, and I am so  thankful for that. It's just such a treat to pick up the phone and chat with someone who completely understands right where I am at and exactly how I am feeling.

On top of it, I leave the good 'ol District Office at the end of this month to embark on a whole new chapter known as graduate school. I often ponder my own insanity at my utter excitement and joy about starting school again, but I know it's where God is calling me. However, I also face mixed emotions as I prepare to leave the office that has been a second home for me the past two years. I met one of my dearest friends at that office and have gained so many more wonderful friends through working there. On top of it, I gained about four moms who have not only made sure to harass me but also invested in me and my future. In looking back, I have really seen the impact they made on my life. I won't ever forget that. They have helped make me the person I am today.

I know each season serves its purpose, and I have definitely seen the fruits of the past two years. I have grown, I have changed, I have been strengthened. I know this next season will bring so many more unanticipated times of growth and excitement. I'll graduate the same time as two of my dear friends, and it is exciting to have people on this particular journey with me. (I actually get to graduate WITH one of them! Holla!) And who knows where life will lead me after next June. It's been one exciting ride, and I can't wait to see what is next on this crazy adventure God is taking me on.

So tonight as I sit at this computer, I think back on times spent with some of the best friends in the world. I think back on an office that has truly shaped and prepared me for ministry in ways I never dreamed or imagined. I also look ahead to the next step and the great adventure it is sure to be.

I sure am thankful for a God who walks every road.

"The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him." - Psalm 28:7

Thanks for letting me ramble.

Until next time,
Em

A New Journey

Well folks, it is official. I am now a grad student at good 'ol Regent University. WEIRD! (Hopefully no one from the university will see my use of the fake word "ol.") I received my official phone call last Thursday and my letter via email today. I even sent them my non-refundable deposit! It seems a little surreal after all the time I have spent thinking about it. However, August 2013 starts a whole new adventure for me, and this is one I am really stinking excited about.

With the start of graduate school, my time at the District Office will officially come to a close. (I'm sure I will post more on that as the time approaches.) When I leave at the end of July, I will have been here for almost two years. My time here has taught me a lot, and I have made several life-long connections and friends. For this, I am forever thankful.

I have felt nothing but love and support since I first started on this new journey of pursuing a Master's Degree. From the GRE to my admissions interview, I have been encouraged and uplifted even in moments of nervousness and doubt. I know this is what God is calling me to, and I eagerly anticipate seeing how it will unfold in future steps. For now, I am just enjoying the unexpected ride.

As I am filled with such excitement and anticipation, I am also carrying a heavy heart. These past few months have seemed to carry with them a lot of tragedy. As I have watched one of my dearest friends these past few weeks begin to sort out what will be her new normal, I am reminded that everyone walks a different path and has a different journey. Some of our journeys, however, aren't of our own choosing. Over these past few weeks, I have often found myself asking God, "Why? Why God? Why do these things happen?"

Man, am I thankful I serve a God who can handle all my questions.

Even though I don't understand why everything happens, I do know that I serve a God who is bigger than any hardship and any road less traveled. I know He walks side-by-side with each one of His kids and takes their hands to guide them on.

And this very promise offers me hope.

If I have learned anything over my last 23 years of life, God is much more about the journey than He is the destination. Thank goodness He walks every last possible journey with us - even the ones that make absolutely no sense.

So, I walk into the next few months extremely excited and extremely aware of the ever present necessity of a God who walks every road.

I pray that no matter your journey, you will feel the God of peace take every last step with you.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

In Him,
Em

James

No, the title of my blog is not some ominous way of telling you all about the special man in my life. This James, however, has completely changed and challenged everything about how I do life. This James lived in a very different time. This James died for that which he so strongly believed in.

This James was Jesus' brother.

It is well past my bedtime, but I have just completed the homework for Beth Moore's study on the book of James. I am bursting. The study is called "Mercy Triumphs," and I not only encourage, but I implore you to get your hands on this study and dig into the convicting and irreplaceable truths. Over the past seven weeks, God has done a great amount of surgery on me. As grotesque as that may sound, I can think of no other way to phrase it.

But this "surgery" has done a complete lift on my spiritual life, and it is one I could not be any more thankful for.

As I learned about the man James and read his very convicting epistle, there were a few things that stood out to me:

1) It wasn't until James stood at the empty tomb of Jesus that James realized that his half-brother was really who he said he was all along - the savior of the world. In one of the passages we read in Acts, it almost seemed as though James and the other siblings of Jesus mocked him. However, when James discovered the saving grace in the man he called brother, he took a hold of that truth and ran with it with all his might.

2) He knows how to tell it like it is. All of my closest friends are extremely blunt, and I love it. As I poured over the book of James, I found myself being reminded of so many practical yet imperative principles that were told in a very straight-forward manner. Do I watch my tongue? Do I let praise and cursing come out of my mouth? Do I believe that Jesus is who He says He is? Do I ask for the wisdom that can only come from God? Do I show favoritism? Do I extend the love of Christ to the orphan and the widow, to the homeless and the poor? Do I forget about my own will and surrender to the will of the one who knows best? Do I consider the source of my frustration? Do I consider it pure joy when I face trails of many kinds? The answer to all of these questions and so many more that James stirred within me is no, I don't always. However, you better believe I am making a conscious effort to try with all of my might. From the very begining of this study, Beth Moore challenged us to not just be "touched" by this series but to truly be "changed."

3) James lived out his faith. Over and over again, I was reminded that my faith without works is dead. I still hold to the standard that no work I could ever do will save me. I am saved by the grace of God alone. However, how could I have this life-changing experience and not want to walk it out? How could I not want to be the hands and feet of Jesus to a lost and dying world around me? James lived his life in the hot spot. Jerusalem was not a very friendly place to the Christian movement of the early church, but James knew his mission was to tell that Jewish community about Christ and the saving work He did on that cross. James eventually died for that cause. Do I have the kind of faith that James had?

This series is only just beginning to seep into the pores of my spiritual skin. However, I am reminded yet again that those words were not just written on a page 2,000 + years ago; they are living and active today. As I did this study, I almost felt like James was speaking right to me. I am so thankful that man penned those words.

I don't know if there is more to this post than just pure reflection. Let's face it though, if I would have tried to hand write it all in my journal, my hand may have fallen off due to cramping so thanks for letting me take up some space on the inter web.

I have also been challenged to really invite God into my Bible reading times. I know that may sound dumb, but I have found it so easy to get caught in the trap of routine. I wake up, read my four chapters, eat my cereal, and go to work. But do I really let myself be changed by what those words say?

As much as I truly appreciate Beth Moore and all she does and teaches, she is not with me every time I open the Word. However, the Holy Spirit is. As I delve into the words that so deeply apply to my life today, I want to be continually changed. I want to have the wisdom from above to receive what God wants me to learn. I don't want to just read black ink on a page; I want to be transformed by the writing God is continually etching on my heart.

This may officially be the most random (and not completely grammatically accurate) post I have ever written. However, I just had to write out these reflections. If nothing else, I challenge you to ask God to give you fresh eyes to read His word. I have read the book of James countless times. However, I have never had it hit me over the head in such a way as it did these last seven weeks. That is the cool thing about God and His word; there will always be something more we can get out of it.

Thanks for letting me ramble!

Love you guys.

In Him,
Em

Overcome

It has been one jam-packed month that has consisted of the following: study time, gym, more study time, work, friends, family, church, youth functions, sleep, more study time, more gym time, etc...you get the gist.

I'm two weeks out from taking this oh so exciting GRE, and with 20 hours of study time already under my belt, I'm starting to feel a little more prepared. If you would've told me two years ago that I would be dedicating every spare moment (let alone well over 20 hours) to studying for a grad school entrance exam, I would've laughed in your face. Hard. Oh the irony of how God works.

God knows that I'm a words of affirmation person. (Let's just be honest, I think I have all five love languages all the time.) Of course He knows, He is the one who created me. In creating me this way, God has also seen fit to surround me with lots of encouraging friends, especially as I've decided to continue my journey into education. I can't even begin to count the amount of times I've heard statements like, "You're going to rock this test," or "You're extremely smart. Of course you're going to blow this thing out of the water." Every time I hear this, I can almost picture myself having a Rocky Balboa moment. I can now enter the GRE boxing ring of life and happily give it a nice little KO. (I sure hope I got that boxing analogy right. If not, hopefully you get the point.)

However, even though the words surrounding me (and oh so wonderful gifts like Starbucks gift cards) are phenomenal encouragements, the greatest motivational tool I have in all this is the good 'ol Bible. Ever since I was a little kid, Philippians 4:13 has been something I could recite like my ABCs: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." What a simple yet incredibly profound statement, especially in this particular season of life.

In leading worship for the kids, God has prompted me on several occasions to remind them that our great God can help overcome any obstacle, mountain, or hurdle. It's something I've often had to remind myself of and something I hope sticks with them as they journey on through middle school, high school, college, and the adult world. My current mountain isn't life-threatening or dangerous, but it definitely has the element of uncertainty.

My current mountain is this test. I hate tests. With every fiber of my ever-loving being. I haven't thought about quadratic formulas or Pythagorean theorems for well over six years. However, I know that God has called me to this. He wants me in grad school. He wants me to pursue a Master's of Arts in Human Services Counseling, and I know He will give me the strength I need to pass this particular test with all the flying colors I will need.

So I encourage you. Your mountain may look really scary. Your hurdle may seem insurmountable. But God can and will give you the strength you need to overcome. Tests come in many different forms and are often much more daunting than this one currently facing me. However, I fully believe that God continually gives us the tools and encouragement we need to pass whatever tests come our way with flying colors.

God's always for you. Who can be against?

Thanks for letting me ramble.

Until after the GRE,
Em